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50 Ways To Say No To Sex And 50 Ways To Get Around Them
By Roberto Bell
1."I just had my hair done"-Giving me a blow job won't mess your hair up at all.

2."I don't feel good."-You know they say eating penis helps with sickness.

3."I don't want to get pregnant."-You can't get pregnant from a little anal.

4."Don't you respect me?"-I'll do more than respect you if you'll spread em.

5."No."-Ok,you might want to just punch her and rape for this one.

6."I want my first time to be special."-We can break out the furry handcuffs if that'll suit you.

7."I want to wait until I'm married."-Good one,married couples don't fuck.

8."I'm not attracted to you like that."-Would you like another beer?

9."I don't want an STD"-Trust me,I don't have a green dick.

10."Go to hell"-I will after I go to heaven,that is if you'll take me there.

11."I have to take a shower."-Awesome,you know how to have fun.

12."My mother would kill me."-Fine,I'll bang her too so she don't get jealous.

13."I have a boyfriend,he'll be mad."-Your boyfriend is cheating on you.I know it hurts to hear,but I can make it all better.

14."If you loved me you'd wait until I was ready."-No,if you loved me you'd do anything for me.

15."We can have fun without having sex."-Yes,I could have fun without playing hockey,but that don't stop me from playing it.

16."This isn't the right place."-Ok,my house isn't far away.

17."I have things to do."-Yeah...I'm waiting.

18."I have a headache."-I have Advil.I'll be ready in about 20 minutes.

19."Isn't this a bad place to do it?"-Now what's wrong with a little sex in the McDonalds cooler now and then?

20."My car needs washed."-Oh good,I've never had sex in an automatic car wash before.

21."I'd feel slutty"-So,you probably should.

22."I'm tired."-Ok,get a power nap and I'll watch TV till you get back.

23."I have to take my clothes to the laundromat."Well aren't you going to need something fun to do while they wash?

24."I'm meeting my friends tonight for dinner.I have to go."-Hmm...are your friends attractive?

25."Sorry bye!*leaves*"-*Catches with rope.*You know the drill.

26."Sorry I'm meeting the Epic tonight."-Ok,there really is nothing that will keep a woman from seeing me.

27."I would much rather go out for dinner."-Ok,how about after that?

28."Can't we do something else?"-Yes,but that's not the point.

29."My favorite TV show is on."-You have Tivo bitch.

30."I'm hunrgy."-How about eating a really big wiener?

31."I have too much respect for myself to have sex at an early age."-I respect you enough to want in your pants.That deserves

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